Today was a tough day. Not only physically, but emotionally as well. 3 hours of sleep prior to being on my feet, literally for 8 hours straight is not a fun thing. Then to add on a "failure to progress" after 3 hours of pushing with a woman who just wanted to have an uncomplicated labor and delivery, and then an hour and a half c-section, and the smell of burning flesh and amniotic fluid...not a good combination. It was a day filled with new and exciting things, but I'm exhausted.
Emotionally, I haven't had as difficult day for almost 3 months. I'm tired of being upset and tired of being fooled/manipulated. I don't want to say "I give up," but I don't really know what else to say. These are the times I so wish I had someone who could look ahead and who knows me better than myself, who could just tell me what to do. I just have to tell myself enough is enough and everything will be alright.
